Initiative

 Why did I start this blog?

I don’t know. That’s the short answer. But, I’m writing in it right now, so there are clearly more details beneath the shrugging of an answer to a question I asked myself.

As of this typing, I’m a 46 year old father of 3, grandfather of 1. I’m sitting at my kitchen table on a cheap Chromebook, using an AD&D 2e “Tome of Magic” as my mousepad. A small, spiral notebook is hanging out, off to the side. You know, just in case. I live with my girlfriend of nearly 5 years and my two youngest wildlings. Afforded the opportunity to gush (and this is my own blog, so why not…), they’re the most incredible little creatures whose souls were lucky enough to win the body lottery and land a spot on this planet. With me. I’m sure they’ll come up a lot in these writings because, while I’m starting this as an outlet borne from my inability to have alone time or narrow my focus into my hobbies and interests as often as I’d like, they still dominate my mental space, in a very good way.

I have an on again/off again relationship with social media and right now, I’m on a very long off. While that’s a feat, nay, a proficiency (non-weapon, of course), I still needed a spot to talk shit. In the long years since I became a father, I’ve had to play hobby triage with all the things I love. I stopped collecting, cut massive swaths of attention from all of the immaterial and material things I’d focused on for years, and adapted to the insular life of a father with children to raise and bills to pay.

In the last nearly 2 years, I’ve reinvigorated not only my focus on hobbies, but reintegrating myself with old friends who share the same interests. Not that we ever lost touch (the internet does have some benefits), but I just wasn’t available, or at least wasn’t making myself available. Sure, I have years of text and message threads that dive into the minutiae of nonsense details on everything from Dungeons and Dragons to Star Trek to baseball to classic post-punk and metal albums. But, the hangouts became less and less. Then they’d ramp up, me attempting to ride high on that day’s serotonin-infused planning, only to crash and burn and start no-showing or canceling plans again. Sometimes because I had to, sometimes because I just couldn’t be bothered. But, over the last couple years, the flows have started to outpace the ebbs. 

I’m back at a gaming table. No, THE gaming table. There have been many throughout the past 30 odd years I’ve loved the hobby, but all of them that mattered were lost to the sands of time, relocation, and disinterest. The one left has never stopped, and is bellied-up to by some of my oldest friends. The invitation was always there. Conversations with them never stopped and the “Hey…just letting you know, we’re playing on Saturday…” messages would always pop in. Of course, I’d want to go, but I’d never commit. Or I’d commit and cancel. Or I’d show up once, renouncing my absenteeism and promising to return consistently. I wouldn’t. But, in April of 2025, something changed. The prior year was filled with lifestyle changes, shifts in attitude, and a realization that I did nothing for myself. Not to toot my own horn, but toot fucking toot, I was/am really good at putting everyone before me. Now, every Friday, barring cancellations, I’m at a table with old friends, rolling dice, talking shit, and blowing off steam in a fashion I forgot could be so cathartic.

My interests haven’t necessarily taken the front seat, but they’re at least in the second row captain’s chair. I indulge in all of them as often as I can and life has adjusted to their slow reintroduction. They were always there, but they just didn’t show up very often. And that’s what this blog is. I’ll wax dipshit about myriad topics. It won’t be breaking news. It won’t be confessional. But, it will be stupid and heavily opinionated.

And it will very likely mostly be about TTRPGs.